Friday, November 27, 2009

Monday, November 23, 2009

Link to Writing Center Handouts

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Portfolio Revision Task Sheet

Write the names of the three papers that you plan on including in your portfolio. List the papers from strongest\most finished to weakest\least finished. In the table below, break each paper down to its “parts.” This will allow you to get a good sense of your papers strengths and weaknesses.

Paper Title

Thesis statement

Structure\Paragraphs\

Topic mini-outline

Conclusion

Draft with my comments. Do you respond to my comments in your revision?

MLA Citation

(in-text and works cited page)

Over 2.5 pages in length

Score\Revision Plans



Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Essay 5: Personal Essay

A personal essay is an essay based on the author's lived experience. The personal essay is usually based on the writer's life and uses the first person. The personal essay can explore memories, ideas, feelings, beliefs, tastes, identities, fears, wishes, and dreams. For essay 5, you will write a personal essay. The essay may explore a memory, a relationship, a favorite thing (object, song, activity, place), a least favorite thing, an observation, an idea, a goal...the list goes on. Before you jump into writing your paper, spend some time prewriting, reflecting, thinking about the significant events and people in your life; reflect on the things that you care about; reflect on what you've learned and how you've changed; reflect on what you do every day and why you do it. Consider the mundane: sometimes the smallest details -- the color of a pillowcase, the way you eat your favorite foods, the way you organize your address book -- can become profound. You can write about anything you want as long as you do it with focus, creativity, and thoughtfulness. Your essay should be between 2.5 and 5 pages.

1. Cover the Basic Facts

Keep in mind that your reader may not be familiar with your interests or background.You may have to explain certain aspects of your story. Always assume your reader is intelligent, but that they may have a different background than you.

2. Vivid Detail

Your words will come alive with strong, active verbs. Strong: The puppy whimpered and cowered in the corner. Weak: The puppy was afraid. Use carefully considered adjectives.Describe important aspects of your story in greater length and condense less important aspects.

3. Voice/Personality

Decide whether you want to be totally serious, funny or somewhere in between. Humor is fine, just don’t overdo it and it’s best to avoid sarcasm. Can your reader get a sense of who you are or what impression you want to make by telling your story? Ask yourself how you want to come across.

4. The Meaning of Your Story

This should be discussed in a full paragraph before the conclusion. You may also reflect on your feelings and ideas throughout the essay. If you’re not sure what the point of your story is before you begin writing, take more time to figure it out.

*Final Points*

No surprise in the writer, no surprise in the reader. Hopefully you’ll discover something about yourself you didn’t know before doing the essay, even it it’s just little details. Hopefully this will be a piece of writing you will delight and/or take pride in - not just another school assignment.

Your draft of paper 5 is due Monday, November 16th. If you wish to include this essay in your portfolio, you will need to revise it, and revise it again (all of the papers in your portfolio must include at least 2 drafts).

Portfolio Contract (must be included with your portfolio)

PORTFOLIO ASSESSMENT GUIDELINES FOR STUDENTS

Portfolio assessment enables the English Department to judge your readiness for English ll0 by evaluating selected samples of your writing. English instructors will look at your final drafts and your earlier drafts to assess your ability to think, plan, draft, revise and edit your work. You will choose three essays from among all those you have written for the course. Two of these must be expository essays, and the third may be either narrative or expository. One of these three essays must respond to a written text (all summaries, paraphrases, and quotations should be cited according to MLA format). The fourth essay will be your timed essay, which your instructor will place in your portfolio. This timed essay allows evaluators to assess your ability to plan, write and revise without assistance from your instructor or your peers.

In order to qualify for portfolio assessment, you must have completed all requirements established by your instructor for course credit. In other words, only students in good standing will be considered for portfolio assessment.

Specific requirements for your selected portfolio essays:

l. The final draft must be typed and free of instructor’s or peers’ comments or marks. It may include neatly penned corrections. Each paper should be more than two and a half pages and no more than five pages, with a standard l2 point font and 1.25 inch margins. Double space the entire essay.

2. All prior drafts should be stapled to the back of the final draft. You should have a maximum of three prior drafts and a minimum of one. At least one of your prior drafts must have instructor comments.

3. Do not include a title page. Type a heading in the upper left hand corner of page one as follows: your name; the course; the date. Use the header to put your last name and page number in the upper right hand corner of each page. Do not include your instructor’s name. (If your instructor’s name is on any prior drafts, please cross it out with black ink.) Center your title below the heading. (See other side for model.)

4. Place your three essays in a standard sized manila folder (not an envelope). Manila folders are available in the SBCC bookstore for 20 cents; do not use any other type of folder please. Your instructor will add your departmental essay exam.
* If your portfolio does not meet the above criteria, it will be automatically disqualified.


My portfolio meets the requirements l-4 listed above.

Signed,

___________________________________________
Student
Please include this sheet (with your signature) in your portfolio

PORTFOLIO POLICY (Portfolios due Monday, November 30th)

SANTA BARBARA CITY COLLEGE
ENGLISH DIVISION
PORTFOLIO POLICY

In order to establish students' preparedness for the next English composition course, the English Division has established the following portfolio assessment process: All eligible English composition students submit a portfolio of their three best essays selected from the 5 essays written during the term. (In the case of English 65, students will submit the three essays written during the term.) The student's departmental essay exam—an essay written under timed, supervised conditions—is automatically added to the portfolio. Only students in good standing, that is, those who have completed their instructor's course requirements, are eligible to participate. English Division faculty who have been normed (trained to assess portfolio essays) meet to evaluate the portfolios. Using the departmental rubric (i.e., the criteria score sheet), they review final drafts and earlier drafts, assessing the student's ability to think, plan, draft, revise and edit. Portfolios are then scored pass/no pass.

Portfolio requirements:

1) English 100: At least two of the three revised essays must be expository. And at least one of the three revised essays must respond to a text, using MLA format. Expository essays are the following: definition, causal analysis, comparison/contrast, classification, argumentation, analysis of a text, research essay or a combination of these. The third revised essay may be descriptive, narrative or expository as defined above. Descriptive or narrative essays must demonstrate carefully considered analysis. English 80 and 65: At least one of the three revised essays must be expository. The other two essays may be descriptive, narrative, or expository.

2) English 100: The three revised essays must be over 2 and one half pages and no more than 5 pages long. English 80: The three revised essays must be at least 2 complete pages and no more than 5 pages long. English 65: The three revised essays must be at least one and a half pages and no more than 5 pages long.

3) There must be at least 2 drafts per essay, with evidence of instructor's input; there may be no more than 4 drafts per essay, including the final draft. All drafts must be stapled together with the final draft on top.

4) The final draft must be typed and double-spaced, with 1.25-inch margins and standard
12-point font. It should be free of instructors' and tutors' comments. Minor corrections neatly written in ink are acceptable. For English 80, the student's name and the days and time of the course should appear at the top left of page one and a title should be centered below. For English 100, the student’s name, the course name, and the date should appear at the top left of page one and a title should be centered below. The instructor’s name should not appear on any papers. Substitutions of K#’s for student names are acceptable.

Students with passing portfolios receive credit for their current English course and are eligible for the next level English composition course if they have also fulfilled the reading requirement (that is, if they have been assessed as eligible for English 103 and the next level course is English 110). If not, their writing placement will be held until they fulfill the reading requirement.

Students whose portfolios do not pass receive credit for the A level of their current course. They may enroll in a course at that level once more for credit (and for no-credit thereafter).

"Salvation" by Langston Hughes

I was saved from sin when I was going on thirteen. But not really saved. It happened like this. There was a big revival at my Auntie Reed's church. Every night for weeks there had been much preaching, singing, praying, and shouting, and some very hardened sinners had been brought to Christ, and the membership of the church had grown by leaps and bounds. Then just before the revival ended, they held a special meeting for children, "to bring the young lambs to the fold." My aunt spoke of it for days ahead. That night I was escorted to the front row and placed on the mourners' bench with all the other young sinners, who had not yet been brought to Jesus.

My aunt told me that when you were saved you saw a light, and something happened to you inside! And Jesus came into your life! And God was with you from then on! She said you could see and hear and feel Jesus in your soul. I believed her. I had heard a great many old people say the same thing and it seemed to me they ought to know. So I sat there calmly in the hot, crowded church, waiting for Jesus to come to me.

The preacher preached a wonderful rhythmical sermon, all moans and shouts and lonely cries and dire pictures of hell, and then he sang a song about the ninety and nine safe in the fold, but one little lamb was left out in the cold. Then he said: "Won't you come? Won't you come to Jesus? Young lambs, won't you come?" And he held out his arms to all us young sinners there on the mourners' bench. And the little girls cried. And some of them jumped up and went to Jesus right away. But most of us just sat there.

A great many old people came and knelt around us and prayed, old women with jet-black faces and braided hair, old men with work-gnarled hands. And the church sang a song about the lower lights are burning, some poor sinners to be saved. And the whole building rocked with prayer and song.

Still I kept waiting to see Jesus.

Finally all the young people had gone to the altar and were saved, but one boy and me. He was a rounder's son named Westley. Westley and I were surrounded by sisters and deacons praying. It was very hot in the church, and getting late now. Finally Westley said to me in a whisper: "God damn! I'm tired o' sitting here. Let's get up and be saved." So he got up and was saved.
Then I was left all alone on the mourners' bench. My aunt came and knelt at my knees and cried, while prayers and song swirled all around me in the little church. The whole congregation prayed for me alone, in a mighty wail of moans and voices. And I kept waiting serenely for Jesus, waiting, waiting - but he didn't come. I wanted to see him, but nothing happened to me. Nothing!

I wanted something to happen to me, but nothing happened.

I heard the songs and the minister saying: "Why don't you come? My dear child, why don't you come to Jesus? Jesus is waiting for you. He wants you. Why don't you come? Sister Reed, what is this child's name?"

"Langston," my aunt sobbed.

"Langston, why don't you come? Why don't you come and be saved? Oh, Lamb of God! Why don't you come?"

Now it was really getting late. I began to be ashamed of myself, holding everything up so long. I began to wonder what God thought about Westley, who certainly hadn't seen Jesus either, but who was now sitting proudly on the platform, swinging his knickerbockered legs and grinning down at me, surrounded by deacons and old women on their knees praying. God had not struck Westley dead for taking his name in vain or for lying in the temple. So I decided that maybe to save further trouble, I'd better lie, too, and say that Jesus had come, and get up and be saved.

So I got up.

Suddenly the whole room broke into a sea of shouting, as they saw me rise. Waves of rejoicing swept the place. Women leaped in the air. My aunt threw her arms around me. The minister took me by the hand and led me to the platform.

When things quieted down, in a hushed silence, punctuated by a few ecstatic "Amens," all the new young lambs were blessed in the name of God. Then joyous singing filled the room.
That night, for the first time in my life but one for I was a big boy twelve years old - I cried. I cried, in bed alone, and couldn't stop. I buried my head under the quilts, but my aunt heard me. She woke up and told my uncle I was crying because the Holy Ghost had come into my life, and because I had seen Jesus. But I was really crying because I couldn't bear to tell her that I had lied, that I had deceived everybody in the church, that I hadn't seen Jesus, and that now I didn't believe there was a Jesus anymore, since he didn't come to help me.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

In Class Timed-Essay Practice Exam # 2

In Class Timed-Essay Practice Exam # 2

In “Your Trusted Friends,” Eric Schlosser narrates the history of marketing campaigns directed at children, paying particular attention to those developed by two of America's most iconic corporations: McDonald's and Walt Disney. He also describes the rise of "syngery" -- when two entities cooperate in order to achieve a final outcome that benefits both -- and identifies this as an evolving force in the consumer landscape, and concludes that "America's fast-food culture has become indistinguishable from the popular culture of its children." What conclusions can you draw based on the information Schlosser provides? Should corporations be allowed to market directly to children? Write an essay in which you state and explain a position in response to Scholsser's article.


You will have 1 hour to write your response. You response must be at least 5 paragraphs in length and should include a thesis statement, evidence, and analysis. You should include at least two quotes from Schlosser’s article. I suggest that you spend at least 10 minutes planning or prewriting, 40 minutes writing, and 10 minutes to look over your paper and make any necessary corrections.

When you are finished, you may leave. Before you leave, please show your draft to me. You will take your draft with you. You must do two things with your draft before Monday. 1.) Type up what you wrote in class without making any revisions. Save and print this document. 2.) Revise your draft: expand your examples, refine your analysis, adjust your structure and organization, polish your transitions, and correct any errors in grammar, diction, or syntax. Save this version as a new document and print it out. On the print out of your revision, underline or highlight all of the changes and revisions that you made. Bring your handwritten draft, the typed transcription of your draft, and your highlighted revision to class on Monday.

Marketing Junk Food to Children